My love of cyclists
Published 1 year, 9 months ago in My life.How much do I despise cyclists, let me count the ways.
They take no test before they mount their velocipedes and head off into the busiest traffic. No mental test, which means that across the whole spectrum of knowledge of the rules of the road the average cyclist falls somewhere in the range of little to none.
They take no physical test so they can therefore be half-blind (or worse), deaf, maimed or spastic or any combination of these. Physical inability to control their vehicle is of no importance.
They pay no rego or third party insurance. So they use the roads and cycle lanes without paying for them and if they damage your vehicle they can escape without penalty because they carry no identifying marks.
They have no speedometers so the can cheerfully exceed the speed limits of 40, 50, 60 kmph, even 70 if their shaven legs can pummel fast enough, with impunity.
They wear the most unwarranted, ridiculously loud outfits, emblazoned with lurid letters and symbols advertising god knows what to nobody who gives a damn.
They demand the width of a car when you pass them but miraculously slim down to the thickness of a sheet of paper at traffic lights so they can squeeze between your car and the pavement or your car and the truck alongside. And then they wobble off in front of you, delaying your progress further until the next set of lights where they then amazingly morph into a pedestrian and cross on the Green Man before disappearing along the pavement.
The cumulative number of productive man-hours lost by couriers, tradies, people on the bus and general motorists as they are delayed by cyclists is nothing less than criminal. Imagine walking down the street half a K with your fishing rod and holding up all the traffic. The Old Bill would soon be feeling your collar.
So, to sum up: foolish, reckless, selfish, arrogant, dangerous and stupid. Can anyone think up any other adjectives to describe your average cyclist ?
Oh, by the way, I don’t drive. I either walk or ride (behind my chauffeur, naturally).
6 Responses to “My love of cyclists”
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Now put as much effort into cars, add the fact that nobody indicates anymore, everybody seems to be on their status symbol mobile phone. I have even seen people texting, my god! Add the facts that average car driver does not follow the prescribed speed limit, they are pushy aggressive and inconsiderate and always seem to commute alone.
Cars are a luxury the world can’t afford for much longer. Watch your garden die and blame your car. And when your done, ‘get on your bike!’
I don’t hate cyclists as you do but I must admit that their penchant for Lycra does amuse me. Most of these guys wouldn’t be caught dead in purple and yellow spandex under normal circumstances!
Oh.. cyclists. I have no problem with the concept of cyclists out there- good on them, they’re keeping fit and helping carbon emissions at the same time. No doubt about that…
However, as a driver sharing the road with them though, I agree. They do generally give me the sh##s. I feel terrible admitting this, I do, but it’s the truth and I won’t deny it.
Basically they frighten me.. I hate passing them on roads where there is not a side lane for them (most roads!)
I really get quite tense and anxious when I see them ahead of me - particularly along windy roads in the Dandenongs etc.
It may sound cruel my friends, but I can’t help feeling that alot of the time they are creating further risks on the roads for both themselves and drivers.
My main point is - WHY don’t they choose more appropriate spots to ride? I have a horse but I am not allowed to ride it wherever I please… I ride it where it is safe to do so, which would never in my right mind be public roads.
I understand that cyclists must be respected and that they are also outnumbered, and majority rules is not always accurate, or indeed just.
Socrates will back me up there.
Basically, it’s just that having them on the roads calls for a serious degree of awareness (fine) - but the ability to spot them in enough time and give them enough space when there isn’t any?
We must do our best I suppose?
I haven’t ridden a bike in years but I do own one and could easily ride to work each day. If I did, here’s what I’d have to say to you Doc.
Most cyclists do pay rego - they have cars too, just choose to leave them at home sometimes.
Cyclists wear ridiculous outfits (there is no escaping the fact that they are ridiculous) so self-centered morons in cars can see them.
Cyclists may occasionally hit your car but they won’t write it off and driver and passengers will escape unscathed every time.
A cyclist may hit a pedestrian but they won’t kill them.
A cyclist can commute from home to work to home with no air pollution and no carbon emissions.
It took me 45 minutes to travel about 1.5km in my car along Springvale Rd last week. Not a cyclist in sight. I can’t remember the last time I was stuck in traffic, surrounded by cyclists. I’d say never.
But I don’t ride so I won’t bother defending them, I’ll just say this. Get over it Doc, cyclists aint that bad.
So, fossil “A cyclist may hit a pedestrian but they won’t kill them.”
An elderly man has died after being knocked down on a pedestrian crossing by a speeding cyclist in an unofficial race called the “Hell Ride”. James Gould, 77, was on the crossing in Beach Rd, Mentone, when he was hit by the cyclist about 8.30am on Saturday. He died in hospital yesterday.
Note. On a pedestrian crossing !!!
I rest my case !
‘They pay no rego or third party insurance. So they use the roads and cycle lanes without paying for them’
One of the great road myths is that cyclists don’t pay their way. In fact car related taxes ie. fuel excise, rego do not even come close to covering the cost of constructing and maintaining roads.
the BTRE publishes an information sheet on Road expenditure and revenue. The latest is IS 25 and it is located at http://www.btre.gov.au/Info.aspx?NodeId=61. Road related revenue is not hypothecated to roads in Australia. Federal and state government expenditure is sourced from their general revenue. Both state and local government receive road grants from the Federal government and also spend money from their own revenue sources, which in the case of local government is mainly rates. The only money hypothecated to roads is that raised by the Federal Interstate Registration scheme, which is from the registration of interstate heavy vehicles. http://www.dotars.gov.au/roads/motor/firs/index.aspx It is passed on to State governments to spend on the roads used by those vehicles. It is only a small amount of the total road expenditure and is shown in Table three of IS 25.